Flat as a pancake

Thats me i am flat.... flat... flat.... flat... my mood that is.

This whole TTC thing is doing my head in, i just had my mumma over and we were chatting and she told me how she is sad about the miscarriage too and she really is and then i realised i am not gonna be trully happy until i am holding my baby in my arms....... or at least showing my big pregnant belly to the world...

I have never wanted something so badly in my life i mean i want this so badly it almost hurts... and my husband J well i really dont know what i would do with out him i love him so very much he is so understanding and loving and i love him so very much........

I want to post in here that i got my BFP that i am pregnant that the baby is sticking i want to post all of those super duper postive things that i really want in my life... i am trying to visualise it all happening for us again i really do

Sorry this is such a downer blog.... i even had a sicky today cause my throat hurt but just as much cause i am so flat i would have just yelled at my kids and been a mean teacher and they dont deserve that at all :)